My 40th Birthday is coming unceremoniously as it seems

December 18th, 2010 will mark my 40th Birthday. Yippee. woohoo.

Happy fucking birthday to me. It will be a day just like any other day, I’m sure. Let’s see, one year EVERONE forgot my birthday including my Father. Yea, that was fun. Especially since it was just after my Mom passed and she was always my first phonecall on my birthday (never failed) and even if no one else called, I still had my Mom singing me happy birthday. Over the years, my friends have all but forgotten (another big reason to hate having a birthday during the holiday season), and no one even wants to even put any effort to think about it. I don’t want to plan my own party. I don’t want to pick out my own gifts, I don’t want to have to give a list. I might as well just buy my own fucking birthday gifts. The 40th Birthday is supposed to be be this big right of passage, but I don’t even think I want this big extravagant party. Just someone show some effort. Something. I’ve had a SHITTY year. A SHITTY last few years. Almost dying a few times will do that to you. My quality of life is pretty poor right now. I know we don’t have a ton of $$ because of all my medical costs and I’m not asking for an extravaganza. Never said I wanted a party. I just want someone to do something to show they care. Not a single sole has offered to make the day special for me. NO ONE. If anything, it has been made to be that it is so inconveniencing for everyone. At one point I wanted to try to get a few girls to do a girls weekend in Vegas. MIAMI, NYC or AC, just 4-6 girls for the weekend, but finanacially for me that isn’t a possibility now. I’d settle for a day trip somewhere, but no one has stepped up to organize.

I’m always the party planner, the organizer & gift buyer for everyone in both families. I plan every family occasion, buy every family gift, plan every party, including the surprise parties. make the decorations including the centerpieces & favors. I buy all the gifts, the cards & wrap the suckers. For the kids parties, I come up with the concept, secure the location, organize everything, buy all the papergoods, favors, stuff the goody bags, come up with games, make extras just in case, order the cake & take care of everything

Just once, I’d like for someone to do something nice for me. Doesn’t have to be a party, or big extravaganza. just do something and don’t make me do the work. Come up with something, surprise me with a fun way to celebrate this big birthday that I almost didn’t make it to (twice in the last 2 yrs). I’m not asking for big jewelry (have tons of that) just something different and fun. Remember the most fun creative ideas don’t cost a ton of $$, you just have to use your minds.