A whole new round of health craziness, but this time it IS a good thing…Really.

Nothing can ever be simple in the world of my health.  I start the year with a brain bleed.  Then a simple eye exam yields the fact I have Glaucoma in my right eye. 

Now comes the kicker–every 6 months I have to go for mammograms because 1) I seem to continually have suspicious lumps that need removal and 2) my Mother’s history and death from Breast Cancer.  Literally on the day I find out about the Glaucoma, I find yet another lump.  Fabulous.  Really body?  You gonna do this to me now?  So, calls to the docs go out, mammos & US done and there isn’t one lonely lump–it is a network of 14.  Now around the time of surgery #14 to remove lumps 27-30 the surgeon told me, the next time I needed to really seriously consider going for the full ‘monty’, mastectomy & reconstruction.  None of my lumps have been fibrocystic, almost all have been ductal (like my Mom’s cancer) and two were stage 1 dysplasia. 

In keeping with living my life completely out loud, and I am going to apologize in advance to any friends or family I haven’t gotten to personally yet, I am going to make a rather important announcement.  In the next few weeks, I will be having a prophylactic mastectomy & reconstruction.  So much of my healthcare is so far out of my control & spiraling further out of it–this is one thing I can make a positive difference in, especially where my children & family are concerned.  Some of you may think I’m crazy but this is probably the most sane, logical, and courageous decision I’ve made in a long time.

Pinewood Derby, a routine traffic stop & almost getting shot. Just a normal day in the life here!

Sunday started out fairly normal. Aside from the bit of a hangover from the bit of fun with the girls from the night before, it was just a regular morning except for the fact it was PINEWOOD DERBY day. Those of you with Cubscouts know this is a HUGE deal. We run the pack, so derby day is a bit hectic and requires a lot of planning & coordination. This morning, my already addled brain was a tad fuzzy, so my husband took our younger son & headed to the car dealership and I was going to head to pick up breakfast and meet them there. Well…as with everything else in my world, nothing is that easy. I am making a turn at a very reasonable speed (really I was, my truck would roll otherwise) and I see flashing lights behind me. F*ck. Doesn’t Johnny Law have anything better than to harrass me on Sunday morning? I guess not. Now, if I was wearing anything other than the unsexiest shirt in the world–the scout shirt, I probably could have talked my way out of it. I usually can, but nooooooo, I’ve got this chaste tshirt up to my chin and Johnny Law is not playing. He asks for license & registration. I gave him my license but the registration was tucked into the manual & I didn’t see it right away. He said “that’s OK just bring it to ME when you find it.” Now remember this, because it becomes key to the story. So, I rifle thru the glovebox uttering every four-letter word I can think of under my breath & bingo! Find the registration. I go to get out of the truck & I am greeted with “DON’T GET OUT OF YOUR VEHICLE, NEVER GET OUT OF THE VEHICLE, GET YOUR HANDS UP!” Here is a rookie, standing outside the cruiser while the other cop is writing the ticket and he DRAWS HIS GUN ON ME! I said “your partner asked me to bring this to him, I am following his directions. And dude, I am 5feet tall and 100lbs with a back full of metal. The only thing I can hurt is your feelings. Get a grip!” The other cop pipes up and tells him “rookie, put the gun away before you hurt yourself, she is doing what I asked. Get back in the car and shutup.”

So, this is how I nearly got shot for getting a speeding ticket. I’m so gangtsta!