Do you think the vet would microchip my son?

We’re not in Kansas anymore Skippyjonjones! In the period of about 10 days we experienced a 5.8 earthquake which was the largest recorded in MD for 200yrs, a hurricane (Irene) and the remnants of Hurricane Lee which gave us flash flooding and worse devastation than Irene actually created. Now, Maryland usually doesn’t get this type of wild weather, and certainly not all piled in a short period of time. The worst part of it–it occured in time for the first week of school. Seriously Mother Nature, bitch please. Hadn’t I endured enough this summer with all the boob drama? Now you are going to screw with me getting a few moments of kid free peace before the next round of boob surgery?! Bite me beeyotch! In our area we had power outages of around a week which caused my one child to miss the first two days of school and he had to start the school year on his first day of teenager-dom AND 8th grade. Talk about drama! You would think someone had pantsed him in public. My little conman-in-training who ended up in a 4 month grounding (in 4th grade) for skipping school, was actually dying to start school. He missed the whole first week and nearly drove me to drink.

So, Mr. I can’t wait to start school finally has his first day after Labor Day. Of course it is raining Hippos and Rhinos. Not cats and dogs. It was coming down in gallons. The bus was an hour late in the morning, so I expected it late in the afternoon. When he wasn’t home by 5, I began to worry and called the school for the disposition on the bus. Come to find out after many back and forth phonecalls and TWO HOURS LATER, the little conman-in-training had manipulated the bus driver into dropping him at another child’s home. I had already printed out pictures of him from the Sunday before, wrote down what he was wearing, pulled out the DNA chip kit (get one done if you haven’t–they offer them free at scouting events, kiwanis club events, and events sponsored by the Masons) and was ready to call the police. My husband then started driving to some of the friends homes close by and found him. Then I was ready to hang him from his toenails and scream at him until I had no voice. I swear this kid will be the death of me. But as everyone keeps pointing out–he’s my “payback kid”. I keep threatening to get him microchipped at the vet like we did with the dog. I’m only half joking 😉

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